Parenting

There have been many times that I have felt that I should have worked better at certain things with Anthony. I feel guilty that he doesn't sleep as well as his younger cousin, guilty that he doesn't eat as well as he should or that it has taken him so gosh darn long to poop in that potty. Let me tell you, I read all the books and I did everything they told me to. I listened to Anthony cry it out for over an hour and it never worked. I read, The Happiest Toddler on the Block, from front to back and did what they told me to. That's right, I sat there and tried to show him that I felt his emotions whenever he was mad. Me: " Your are mad right? Mad, mad mad. Well I am mad also (while I show my mad face and stomping on the ground) but we can't go out right now, but we can play inside if you want." FAIL! I don't care what the author says, it doesn't work on every kid. I tried every hint to get him to potty, I even gave him a potty party that has never had a student not succeed. What does that mean? It means that I took a day off of work and we spent the entire day having a superhero party where we bought a baby doll for Anthony to train while I trained him. We danced and cheered every time the doll used the potty and every time Anthony peed or attempted it, we watched nothing but potty videos and read nothing but potty books. He did great that day and then NOTHING. Didn't matter what suggestions the book gave, Anthony didn't care to listen to them. FAIL, again. I have determined that my kid is just hard headed. He has always done his own thing and not cared what he is "supposed" to be able to do. Still, it doesn't feel great to have the kid who only wants to eat mac and cheese, apples, bananas and grapes. Or the only one in his class that refuses to use the potty. It really started making me feel bad about not being a good parent.

Then, this Friday morning in class I had a conversation with a student who had told me he hadn't done his homework. This was unlike him so I asked him what happened. He told me that his Dad helps him and if his Dad can't then his Uncle helps him. He went on to say that his parents went out and his Uncle didn't get to their apartment early enough to help him. I asked him where his Mom and Dad went and he didn't want to tell me. Another student asked him if his parents had gone out dancing and he just looked down and shook his head yes. He then told me that he had asked them to please not go because he and his little brother were scared but that they did anyway. I asked him if his Uncle ever got there and he said yes but he was already asleep and he was very scared when he got there because it was very late and he didn't know who was coming in. I asked him when his parents got there and he said when it was almost time for him to go to school. I went and sat down and he came up to me and asked me to please not tell anyone because his Mom told him if he did then she could get in trouble. I tried not to show him how upset I felt at hearing this. What parent does this?

Sadly, these are the type of students I have. Not all have parents like this but almost all have parents who struggle as low income parents or want to help but don't have the education or understand English enough to help.

So it made me realize. Yeah, my kid doesn't go to bed at 8 on the dot. But he has a Mom and Dad who always lay and tell stories or read to him before he does go to bed. Our latest story involved Prince Anthony saving Princess lily from fire breathing dragons who wanted to eat her castle full of candy and toys. He has parents who care enough to read up on ways to get him to cope with tantrums without feeling like we don't care. He has parents who play ball with him everyday, who talk to him about his day everyday and who listen to everything he has to say. He has parents who jumped up and down ,danced, hooped and hollered when he finally pooped in that no good potty. Even a Mom who started to cry when she saw how happy and excited he was to have finally pushed that poop out. That's right! I cried when he finally did it.

He will never have to tell his teacher that his parents left him home alone when he begged them not to. Parenting isn't easy but I don't think we have done to bad on it.

Pics from April:

Driving around the neighborhood.

Easter
Hmmmmm...... who can I get next.
Loved his new baseball helmet.

Getting Bodie.

Sweetness